Dinner & Movie - Part 1

"...take yourself out for dinner. A restaurant with linen and silverware. You're no less intriguing a person when you're eating solo dessert and cleaning the whipped cream from the dish with your finger. In fact some people at full tables will wish they were where you were.
Go to the movies. Where it is dark and soothing. Alone in your seat amidst a fleeting community." - Tanya Davis, How To Be Alone

This concept was so new to me, not only b/c I'd never done it, but being that my preconceived notions on the matter were that, quite frankly, to do these things alone was rather pathetic. It's often been suggested to me by friends, seeing that I needed a break from life for a while, to just pick up and take myself out; to pamper myself.

Go to a fancy restaurant, by yourself?

Buy a ticket at the theater for one?

Who does that?

Apparently, lots of ppl, it just went unnoticed by me.

So I did it. I didn't want to start out this strong, but the opportunity presented itself and I dashed for it like it was a dog who had just broke free of his leash and ran (not sure if I was the dog or the owner in that scenario).

I went all out. Shaved my legs, did my hair, put on make-up, and picked out the best clothes I owned to wear (which isn't saying much, but oh freaking well, I tried).

As I was in my new favorite spot (the bathroom), I was surprised at myself at how meticulous I was being with my make-up. I wanted it to look perfect. But why? I wasn't going to impress anyone. Chances were I wouldn't run into anyone I knew, so why the fuss over what to wear and look like?

B/c it was nice, and I wanted to. That's why. If I'm gonna look good for anyone, it might as well be me.

When I donned the attire, and stepped out of my room to look at myself in the full length mirrors I have in my kitchen, I almost didn't recognize myself. I hadn't seen that girl since before she'd gotten married. She was a good bit rounder now, but it was exciting to see her nonetheless.

My furry babies (my two cats) seemed rather excited too. Perhaps they could feel it in the air.

Before I left the house in my red high heels and killer matching outfit, I popped on a flare button to my overcoat, to give me inspiration.

It read: I'M WITH AWESOME

Very fitting I'd say. I was actually nervous about dating myself, how strange is that?!

So, I bought my movie ticket first, before going out to dinner. That was a long walk to the box office. Longer than my walk down the aisle when I married. There were a few eyes in the parking lot, but not many, but I was almost certain they were staring at me. Perhaps it was what I was wearing, lol, but at any rate, at least I looked good.

OAN: the walk back to the car proved rewarding, b/c I snagged a lost lavender Louis Vuitton stole, in perfect condition, and valued at $350 smackeroos (according to the official website). Night started great.

So, off to dinner I go, to one of my favorite restaurants, that I haven't been to in years. A local getup, Oscar's, where there's always fresh flowers on the tables, and candlelight, the staff all have to wear black ties. Very clean, very fresh.

Well, guess what? It's under new management, and it's been remodeled since I've been there last. But it was quaint, just not as nice as I remember.

The host, Bruce, who I later found out was also the GM, was warm and pleasant, but seemed distraught that I was alone. He seated me in the bar area, separated from what was going to be my fine dining experience by walls, closed doors, and a bunch of TVs broadcasting the Australian 4th Open at each freaking table.

Still, I was optimistic. As I sat down in my booth, I realized that perhaps my ass was too big for my dress (as was confirmed later by observing pics I had Bruce take in the lobby-- whoa!) b/c I could feel it come up underneath me and the backs of my bare thighs were pressed against the hard wood of my seat. I was immediately grateful that I was alone.

Once I ordered, I watched a bit of the tennis that was on at my table, and after deciding I might like to play tennis, I turned it off. It was distracting me from my purpose.

My food came out swiftly, to both me and my server's surprise, and it was indeed delicious. Looking at my appetizer, I was suddenly overcome with a sense of deja vu. I had dreamed this up once, not long ago, only I remember in my dream, someone was sitting across from me. Weird.

I took my time with my meal, all while trying not to be irritated with the boisterous crowd of six not far behind me, discussing the internet, and FaceBook, whilst misconstruing networking with popularity.

Then dessert came. It was a crepe filled with gourmet vanilla ice cream (probably Bryer's) topped with whipped cream and chocolate sauce.

It was good, but it wasn't great.

I was actually kinda disappointed with my entire experience there. I paid and tipped my server, and on my way out, I asked Bruce why he insisted on seating me in that area. He told me that he notices that ppl alone seem uncomfortable on the dining room side of the restaurant, and he thought that since I was alone, I'd like to be with a more lively crowd, and being that there are televisions at the tables, I wouldn't get bored.

Boy, was he wrong.

It got me wondering about how ppl surround themselves with strangers all the time, and are in a perfect position to have some sort of contact with another being, have the sting of their loneliness dampened, but yet most times we seclude ourselves despite this, b/c interaction with one another is perceived to be strange or awkward.

I left, irritated and lonely, but reminding myself, "at least I look amazing."

The movies wasn't much better. While the movie itself was phenomenal (The King's Speech), it really defeated the purpose. Aside from one couple sitting down at the bottom row, I was the only other person in there.

"Alone in your seat amidst a fleeting community."  I couldn't feel whatever it was that I was supposed to feel b/c there was no community. Just me, my popcorn and soda, my blanket, and my legs propped up on the seat in front of me.

So yeah, I think there's a reason the list is put together the way it is. I wasn't prepared to take on that challenge just yet; I hadn't gone through the other exercises first. I decided I'm gonna try these both again, separately. Maybe go to a movie on opening night, see what sparks in my head. Maybe treat myself to reservations to a dinner downtown. We shall see.

On the way home, I stopped and bought myself some fancy satin underwear, some tulips, and one of my favorite movies (Tombstone), so the night wasn't a complete waste. I ate, I saw a movie, and I went shopping. Done deal.